Friday, November 21, 2008

Good Morning, Internets

I could never put my finger on it, but something's always bothered me about Miley Cryus. Like High School Musical, her popularity snuck under my radar until suddenly...she was fucking everywhere. Now, thanks to this interview by a poor, unknowing Ellen DeGeneres, I have my answer: Miley Cryus is, in fact, the Anti-Christ. As Internet Jesus, it is my sworn duty to destroy her.

At first, she appears just like another semi-shy teen starlet. But watch the video in its entirety. At a few moments, you see the Cryus creature crack and the imp released. Notice the uncomfortable terror in Ellen's eyes. The mewling horror before her clearly caught the witty television host off guard.

The beast has arrived.

And she's winning. Look at your television. Your Wal-Marts. CD charts. New Miley Order is already here. And goddammit, we may be to late to stop it.

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